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Writing Movies for Fun and Profit: How We Made a Billion Dollars at the Box Office and You Can, Too!

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This is the only screenwriting guide by two guys who have actually done it (instead of some schmuck who just gives lectures about screenwriting at the airport Marriott); “These guys are proof that with no training and little education, ANYONE can make it as a screenwriter” (Paul Rudd).

Robert Ben Garant and Thomas Lennon’s movies have made over a billion dollars at the box office—and now they show you how to do it yourself! This book is full of secret insider information about how to conquer the Hollywood studio how to write, pitch, structure, and get drunk with the best of them. Well…maybe not the best of them, but certainly the most successful. (If you’re aiming to win an Oscar, this is not the book for you!) But if you can type a little, and can read and speak English—then you too can start turning your words into stacks of money!

This is the only screenwriting book you will ever need (because all other ones pretty much suck). In these pages, Garant and Lennon provide the kind of priceless tips you won’t find anywhere else,

-The art of pitching
-Getting your foot in the door
-Taking notes from movie stars
-How to get fired and rehired
-How to get credit and royalties!

And most what to buy with the huge piles of money you’re going to make!

Writing Movies for Fun and Profit will take you through the highs and lows of life as a professional screenwriter. From the highs of hugging Gisele Bündchen and getting kung fu punched by Jackie Chan to the soul-crushing lows of Fully Loaded .

Read this book and you’ll have everything you need to make your first billion the old-fashioned way—by “selling out” in show business!

A portion of the authors’ proceeds from this book are being contributed to the USO of Metropolitan Washington, a private, nonprofit organization dedicated to serving active duty military members and their families in the greater Washington, DC, region.

336 pages, Paperback

First published July 5, 2011

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Robert Ben Garant

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5 stars
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 239 reviews
Profile Image for Nicholas Karpuk.
Author 4 books67 followers
August 30, 2011
Some reviews of this book have referred to sections of it as "fluff". What they call fluff, I call the funny bits. This book is as much a mockery of screenwriting guides and Hollywood as it is an in depth look into the matter.

Even though I write, I've never really had a compulsion to go out to LA and give the world of big studio screenwriting a whirl, and this book has in no way changed my mind. While they pretty explicitly state some parts of this, it's valuable to remember that these guys primarily sell broad comedies to big studios, so their advice is probably more applicable to comedy writers than someone who wants to write dramas.

The bits where they take the stuffing out of failed writers turned public speakers is probably my favorite, and since Goodreads went dead as I attempted to save a much more thoughtful review, I'm going to close on this quote:

"Screenplays are like blueprints. A guy who's drawn up a lot of blueprints that have never actually been made into buildings is not an 'architecture guru,' he's an 'unemployed douchebag.' A guy who talks about screen-writing but who's never sold a screenplay is not a 'screenwriting guru,' he's a 'lecture circuit bullshit artist.' From now on, that's what we'll call them."
Profile Image for Kevin Wright.
19 reviews5 followers
July 28, 2011
This was great! Absolutely great.

1) This is a book about screenwriting written by people who are funny, have sold numerous scripts, and have had hits as well as stinkers. Not only that, they continue to work, so the scenarios they describe are current and things aspiring writers will probably run into. They aren't describing what writing in Hollywood used to be like, rather, how it is right now.

2) Like most of you who would consider picking this book up, I've read just about every screenwriting book out there. We all know three act structure, story paradigm and all that jazz. The authors don't bother hitting you over the head with that stuff, they just corroborate and move on to what you need to know, the practical details like how to handle yourself in meetings, how to take notes that you don't agree with and basically, navigate the studio system and make a living selling screenplays.

3)Did I mention it's funny? These guys have wrote some stinkers but there is no doubt they are legitimately funny and talented.

READ THIS BOOK. Instant classic.
26 reviews
July 25, 2022
tbh they should make a revised version of this where they update some of the jokes that have really not aged well and could be and easy five stars.

Just a fun read honestly! Makes me want to write more!
Author 214 books1,923 followers
October 23, 2011
Screenwriting books are not typically written by successful screenwriters. Apparently, if you're making lots of money as a screenwriter, there's no real motivation to make substantially less money writing a non-fiction book. (In one of the first screenwriting books I read 20+ years ago, the author actually wrote about how nobody in Hollywood would read his scripts, even though he told them he had a book coming out on the subject!)

So it's very refreshing to have a book written by actual screenwriters who have written actual movies. This book is exclusively and emphatically about big-studio films, and only about how to make money in the business, not earn critical praise and Oscar nominations. It's filled with stuff I've never read in a book before, and it's all fascinating. And it's constantly laugh-out-loud funny.

That said, there is a LOT of padding. Some of it is funny, and some feels like an effort to reach a minimum word count. And you can tell they're screenwriters--they often make their point and move on quickly, creating quite a few moments where I wished topics had been discussed in more depth.

Overall, well worth reading, even if, like me, you're not actually pursuing a career as a screenwriter.

Profile Image for Nathan.
Author 5 books128 followers
January 1, 2012
Interesting glimpses of the screenwriting industry, even if the style is sometimes aggressively informal to the point of excess.
The test screenings were SO GOOD, in fact, that we made what was (at the time) our BIGGEST PAYDAY EVER to write the sequel: Taxi 2. Yes, this is how crazy things in Hollywood can be. One of our biggest deals EVER was for Taxi 2—cue the silly punctuation marks!?!?!!?!?
Then, of course, Taxi was released, and not only did it pretty much end the film career of our friend Jimmy Fallon, it was also so WIDELY HATED that, for a while, it was held up as an example of EVERYTHING THAT SUCKS. Even people who actually suck balls for a living didn’t want to be compared with Taxi.


This is a very specific little detail that you’ve seen on movie posters a hundred times but maybe not noticed: the use of the ampersand symbol or the word “and.” There’s a BIG difference when & or and appears between writers’ names:
& means the two named writers worked TOGETHER, as a team (Robert Ben Garant & Thomas Lennon).
AND means that they very specifically DID NOT WORK TOGETHER, but have been forced to share credit (Robert Ben Garant & Thomas Lennon AND Lowell Ganz & Babaloo Mandel).

Profile Image for Elissa.
51 reviews7 followers
August 29, 2011
I've read more than one book on screenwriting, and if you want to write screenplays so should you, and I will happily recommend this one. It's not so much a guide for how to write, it's more about how to survive in Hollywood. They don't even get to the writing tips until the second part of the book. The insight into this mad, crazy industry though is priceless. It's told with a sense of humor that makes you smile even when the anecdote is cringe inducing.

Some of my favorite bits: The insight into what happens in a pitch meeting. The idea of a pitch meeting has always terrified me! And reading this, I think I'm maybe right to be terrified! But actually reading about experiences that people have had... it makes it a little less terrifying in the "I have no idea what to expect" kind of way. And more terrifying in the "Oh yeah, everyone in this industry really is nuts!" way. But whatever. People in this industry are legitimately crazy. Sooner you realize and accept that, the better off you'll be.

I liked the insight into writing with a partner. I think that was possibly the most helpful chapter for myself personally. I read it and it was just "Duh, that's a great idea. My writing partner and I should do that."

Also, list of In N Out locations - completely helpful. That neapolitan milkshake is legit.

In all seriousness though, I loved this book, I loved the inside peak into parts of the industry I have yet to make my way into, and I also loved the inclusion of the outline examples. If you want to be a Hollywood screenwriter, maybe don't replace "Screenplay" or "Save the Cat" on your Must Read list, but it wouldn't hurt to add "Writing Movies" as well.
Profile Image for Cheryl.
5,545 reviews207 followers
July 9, 2012
First off, if you are expecting to really get some good informative information about how to write your first screen play for the big screen, then you probably will get your hopes let down with this book. Not to say that Mr. Garant and Mr. Lennon did not provide the reader with some good street smarts and lessons that they have learned in only a way that Mr. Garant and Mr. Lennon can do. While, I did enjoy Mr. Garant and Mr. Lennon's let it all hang out their sense of humor and say anything attitude in this book, I was expecting to laugh until tears came out but this did not happen. Instead, I read about the first half of this book and then just skimmed the rest of it.

It is understandable how their television show Reno 911 became as sucessful as it was and some of their movies as well. Of course, after reading this book, you can not really blame them for Herbie:Fully Loaded. I am sure what they original wrote was good but after all the other screen writers got their hands on the script, including the director and horrible actor (she who shall not be named but is still alive and not dead). the movie just ended up being a big flop.
\
Important tips you can take away from this book is...Don't bank on just one script, have several. Have a good entertainment lawyer, Dress to impress, Pimp your movie, write your script with a big movie star in mind to play the starring role as they will help to make your dreams come true. Because once you have made it, then you will score the best parking spots at all the major studios.
Profile Image for L_manning.
289 reviews44 followers
July 6, 2011
I should start by mentioning that I have no interest in writing a screenplay. I do however love The State, Viva Variety, and Reno 911!, so I was very familiar with the authors of this book. Naturally I was dying to read it. It was everything I expected and more. There was tons of humor mixed with some really useful information. My favorite section was probably the chapter on determining if you had made it in Hollywood by where the different studios sent you to park.

Through all the humor, you get a real sense of passion for writing. They don't just do this for money; they write because they feel compelled to. They go through their process of writing an outline, pitching to studios, and then writing the screenplay. There is also a lot of useful information about how the studio system works and what to expect from the entire movie making process. I also learned a lot about all the different writing and production credits and the arbitration system with the writing guild. It's all very complex and fascinating.

Clearly if you are interested in writing screenplays, there is a lot of useful information here. Even for us non-writers though, there is so much stuff to learn from this book. Naturally, it's all relayed with tons of humor. I thoroughly enjoyed this book, and I would recommend it to anyone with even a passing interest in movies. It is sure to entertain!

Galley provided by publisher for review.
40 reviews1 follower
September 11, 2011
Even for someone with no interest in writing a studio film, Writing Movies for Fun and Profit is an illuminating look at the Hollywood system.

Robert Ben Garant and Thomas Lennon avoid giving many writing tips, and instead focus on what those other screenwriting books (mostly penned by people who have never gotten a script greenlit) don't tell you - how to actually make it in the business. How to pitch, how to agree with "notes," where your parking spot reveals you are on the Hollywood hierarchy, how to get fired (as you will, a lot), how to spend your piles of money, and what exactly every one of those movie credits means (there is actually a big difference between "written by" and "screenplay by").

Lennon and Garant are very open about having "sold out," and they do spend some pages explaining why "almost every studio movie sucks donkey balls," especially Herbie: Fully Loaded (the answer: development, and rewrites), but they are not defensive or apologetic, and they have no need to be. Lennon and Garant's films have made over a billion dollars at the box office, and as this hilarious book affirms, they haven't lost their cult-renowned senses of humour either.

Writing Movies is a good, quick read for State fans or anyone curious about what exactly those movie studios do.
Profile Image for Stephen Kerr.
12 reviews2 followers
November 27, 2013
A realistic and humorous look at writing big budget screenplays for the Hollywood studio system. These guys have gone through the whole process from all the different angles and have lived to tell the tale, often very humorously. Fans of The State and Reno 911 will get extra mileage out of the sense of humor and especially the entire "scriptment" for the unproduced Reno 911 sequel movie, which is pretty great. What NOT to expect: bullet-point breakdowns of how to write a screenplay. There is some discussion of the basic building blocks, but if you're looking for a how-to guide, read Save the Cat and the first 40 pages of Screenplay. (Sidenote: internalize those rules but don't be beholden to them, if writing a script was really just checking off a series of boxes everyone would do it and every script would be great).

If you're looking for more honest and thoughtful insight into how REAL screenwriting in Hollywood works, be sure to check out the Scriptnotes podcast by John August and Craig Mazin.

This book is highly recommended to anyone interested in screenwriting and understands that there's a place for arthouse "films" and there's also a place for popcorn entertainment. Someone's gotta write Night at the Museum (actually a pretty good family movie) and the like, and these guys can tell you what to expect if you're lucky enough to get a job writing in Hollywood.
356 reviews3 followers
August 1, 2011
While probably most enjoyable to a very narrow part of the reading population (aspiring screenwriters or movie buffs), this extremely pragmatic and entertaining book from the creators of RENO: 911 and NIGHT AT THE MUSEUM is a breezy but practical guide from two guys who have made a fair amount of money navigating the studio system as screenwriters. Full of stories of their adventures and chockablock with information, it's also a business guide much more than an artistic guide to using the Hollywood template to make not only a living but hopefully a killing. That last clause is key: Tom Lennon and Robert Ben Garant don't call themselves artists (even though they are), they call themselves businessmen, and it's a lens that is rarely used by writers to tell their own stories. So while the book may be bought largely by people who want to know the world from this particular slant, it is probably just as enjoyable to anybody who goes to the movies for a big bucket of popcorn and a cold, cold soda.
Profile Image for Campbell Andrews.
448 reviews80 followers
August 15, 2011
Probably one of the best books on being a professional screenwriter. It's no wonder these guys are successful— they've figured out how to navigate the system and provide it with what it needs and rewards, handsomely.

Like their movies, though, it goes a long way on concept and is padded with filler. Sure, give me an example of an outline- but possibly *not* the one for the unmade RENO 911 sequel, 'kay?

Also, the majority of their creative advice is applicable only to writers of mass-market comedies. If this was the only book you read about screenwriting, you'd think no other kinds of movies can be successful, if any others are ever made at all. John August, Steven Zallian, Paul Attanasio, John Logan, Christopher McQuarrie, Scott Frank, Diablo Cody, Frank Darabont, John Sayles? In Garant and Lennon's world, they don't exist. Success keeps out the riffraff, I suppose, but those are careers I'd much rather have— and I think those other guys are avoiding the unemployment office, too.
87 reviews3 followers
November 12, 2011
Garant & Lennon, two very successful (according to them and their credits) screenwriters, have written a how-to on writing, and perhaps more importantly, selling screenplays.

I have no desire to ever write one (not least of which because I have less than no desire to ever live in L.A. one of the things the authors stress many times is absolutely necessary in order to be a screenwriter), but this seems to be a fairly practical guide. It's also pretty hilarious.

What I learned from this book:

You have to live in LA.
You have to use Final Draft (finaldraft.com).
You have to write, write and write some more (universal for any type of writing).
You have to have an agent (and maybe a manager and an entertainment lawyer) so that you can write, write and write some more.
You have to outline (fun!).
You have to be agreeable and not have a big and easily bruised ego (probably easier said than done).
Drinking probably helps (seriously, there's a chapter devoted to that).

And! The difference between "&" and "and", because there is one.


Author 7 books9 followers
December 3, 2011
Super-successful and critically despised screenwriters give you the SECRET to selling and writing billion dollar movies!!!! Written almost as a parody of screenwriting books, the funniest part is that Garant and Lennon are giving Really Good Advice.

Yes, this is a manual for formula writing. But it's really hard to argue with the idea that a movie should be tightly structured, that it should have characters the audience cares about, and that it should above all be entertaining. Lennon and Garant see writers as contractors working in an industry, not as artistes, and this book is ultimately about being a professional contractor who delivers the goods and makes everyone else's job easier. That makes sense in a lot of creative professions, including mine.

Extra points for the glossary that underlines just how many people it takes to make a movie, and for the guide to the chi-chi parking spots of all the Hollywood studios.
Profile Image for Rebecca.
856 reviews60 followers
March 21, 2012
This is seriously one of the best books I have read in while. The authors are comedians, but also writers and this book tells you how to break into the writing industry in Hollywood, but in a funny yet true way. Facts are all there, true stories are all there yet I laughed out loud so much, for a non-fic how-to book. I loved it! My favorite part was their description of all the parking lots at all the studios in Hollywood. I didn't realize how many I have actually been to. The one I have been to the most is the one at Universal and their description of it is spot on. And there were like 20+ pages in the back dedicated to the description of all the credits you see at the end of movies and what each person does. It was really very interesting, though it did go on for a while. But if you are interested in film making, doesn't have to be writing, I highly recommend this book. One of the best I have read in a long time.
Profile Image for Leila Cohan-Miccio.
270 reviews7 followers
July 14, 2011
What a fantastic corrective to the many truly unhelpful books about the industry I've read recently. I've never read a screenwriting book so concrete and through. I loved it.

Related: I went to see Lennon & Garant speak at the Paley Center last night, which was great. When they were signing my book (I am a nerd), I mentioned that I'm a teacher at UCB. They immediately asked me when the Beast is going to open.

So, to recap: things Thomas Lennon, Robert Ben Garant and I have in common: we would all like to know when the Beast will open. Things we do not have in common: the contents of our bank accounts or levels of professional success.
Profile Image for Judith.
1,590 reviews80 followers
February 6, 2017
I read a NYT Book Review interview with Anna Kendricks and she said this book was "hilarious". I'm always up for hilarity so I got this book right away. Turns out the only hilarious aspect is the punctuation. This is one of those books which substitutes all caps, italics, bold type, multiple exclamation points, ellipses, underlining, asterisks, etc. for real words with real meaning. But, hey, I'm the idiot who is taking reading advice from a movie star.
Profile Image for Russell.
246 reviews3 followers
June 4, 2012
This book is like Entourage minus the parts most reviewers describe as "douchey."

It's two smart and funny dudes [the State! Reno 911!] talking about their job. Their job just happens to be screenwriting.

They describe the mystique of what happens and how and why in an entertaining and enjoyable manner. Loved it and learned from it.
Profile Image for Joel.
171 reviews53 followers
June 20, 2012
This is a placeholder review that will be updated when I sell the screenplay I wrote post reading this book. Either way, it's a fun read, but this review is going to seek to give the authors an eReacharound if I end up selling the script.

Speaking of which, anyone know places accepting SUPER-SELLABLE COMEDY SCRIPTS?
Profile Image for Christopherseelie.
230 reviews24 followers
April 25, 2013
Hilarious, short, and more informative about the realities of screenwriting for the studio system than anything else I've come across. It reads like a batch of Cracked.com articles with plenty of amusing bits mixed with actual information. One weekend day is all it takes to enjoy this book, so why not?
Profile Image for Dylan.
29 reviews35 followers
December 26, 2017
Brilliant. Brutally honest, practical and comprehensive.
Profile Image for Adam.
7 reviews1 follower
September 29, 2019
Helpful but very annoying. Please do less. Also, I was surprised when I googled these guys and found that neither have been called out for sexual harassment
Profile Image for Harry Harman.
713 reviews15 followers
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August 29, 2022
YES—you need to be in Hollywood, California, if you’re going to make even TINY piles of money writing movies. Once you are rich and established, THEN, and only then—can you move into a fabulous brownstone next to Ethan Hawke in New York’s independent-movie-loving West Village.

The industry standard for all scripts is a computer program called Final Draft (http://www.finaldraft.com).

Simply sending out your script is perhaps the LEAST likely way to get an agent or manager. The absolute fastest way is to HAVE SOMETHING PRODUCED. Something concrete they can point to and say, “There’s talent.” Even if it’s thirty seconds long and only on the internet. If you don’t know any actors, take a class at the Upright Citizens Brigade in Los Angeles; you will meet tons of actors.

Most studios will not take unsolicited material. They won’t even look
at your script unless an agent or manager hands it to them. And it has to be a rep (“representative”—that means agent or manager) whom the studio has done business with in the past.

high school stereotypes: the popular crowd, the nerds, the slow kids, and the indescribables, with the studios and networks playing the role of athletic departments and school clubs and the power shift changing with each and every project that people put out.

Remember: only a movie star or studio head can get your movie greenlit. There are six or seven studio heads in the entire world and fifteen to twenty movie stars. So shoot for a movie star, and your odds of getting your pitch made into a film will be three times as good. If a movie star wants to make your movie, the studio head will hop on board immediately.

for reasons beyond your control

If you leave the room with them thinking: “We won’t do his ‘Die Hard in a Chuck E. Cheese’ idea, but that guy’s obviously a good writer.” You’ve won! You’re in the door. They’ll call you in on another project. If you’re easy to work with, YOU WILL GET HIRED AGAIN. And again. Be gracious, polite, and the least amount of a dick you can possibly be. Hollywood is a small town, and the assistant you’re complaining to today will be running the studio next year.

Your QUOTE is the industry term for how much money a major studio paid you for the LAST comparable movie you wrote.

Is this is the first movie you’ve ever sold? If it is, you DO NOT HAVE A QUOTE. If you don’t have a quote, the WRITERS GUILD has standard minimum payments for writing a screenplay. As of the printing of this book, the minimum payment for an original screenplay is $109,783.

The good news is—you’ll get more than Guild minimum when: MORE than one studio wants to buy your movie. Then you get to hear two of the most wonderful words you can hear as a writer: Bidding war!

Your SECOND movie deal will always be bigger than the first. Even if your FIRST MOVIE didn’t get made, it’s usually a 10 percent bump-up.

BOX-OFFICE BONUS: Extra money if your movie hits certain prenegotiated amounts at the box office—$100 million, $150 million, etc. WOO-HOO! Buy a boat!
437 reviews2 followers
September 7, 2017
Hilarious insight in Hollywood that not only provides advice on working & writing in films, but some funny tales to boot. Lennon & Garant are open with their tales of working on films from "Herbie" to "Night at the Museum", showing how Hollywood does and doesn't work while giving advice on how to keep making money in it (i.e. if your script is being rewritten, that's a good thing, because the studio will likely still make it). They fill it with plenty of tales of mistakes both they and the studios makes in the business (i.e., when Comedy Central bought the rights to "Reno 911" from Fox, they forgot to by the film rights as well, so when they decided to make a movie, guess who came calling). Plus, they through in their treatments for an original film & the sequel to "Reno 911: Miami" for study and just as fun reads (serious, that "Reno" sequel needs to be made). Great read of anyone interested in writing or just how Hollywood scriptwriting works.
Profile Image for P.G. Sundling.
Author 1 book14 followers
September 26, 2020
Some female readers may not appreciate some of the humor, but the bikini models on the cover telegraph what to expect there. Of the 50-ish writing books I've read, this is the most entertaining one I've ever read.

This is a whirlwind exploration of writing and how Hollywood really works. Including the In-N-Out hidden menu is a nice touch in the living in Los Angeles part.

I'm knocking off a star for not including the inner and outer conflict to their basic formula. They should have included at least that, along with the overall page count of what should happen in a screenplay.

The book focuses on money, but the vast majority of writers never sell a script, so the riches aspect is misleading. It's still worth reading just for the stories, but it will have to be followed up by a more in-depth writing book.
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